Today's poems [4.15.08]

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There once was a man from Leeds
Who swallowed a package of seeds.
Great tufts of grass
Sprouted out of his ass
and his balls were covered in weeds!

There was a nympho named Jill 
Who tried dynamite for a thrill
They found her vagina
All over China
And bits of her tits in Brazil

Sent by Martin

My back aches. My penis is sore.
I simply can't fuck any more.
    I'm dripping with sweat,
    And you haven't come yet;
And, my God! it's a quarter to four!

I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree.
Indeed, unless the billboards fall
I'll never see a tree at all.

   --Ogden Nash, "Verses from 1929 On"

Here I lie in stinky vapor,
   Because some bastard stole the toilet paper,
   Shall I lie, or shall I linger,
   Or shall I be forced to use my finger.


  

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