Today's stories [3.20.08]

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Jon John, the world's worst basketball player,
was arrested and charged with brawling in a
public place. He pleaded guilty and threw himself
at the mercy of the court.... and missed. 

One of the most effective ways of sharing the feeling of God's daily
presence with the family is to have the children ask the blessing for
the evening meal.  But, of course, many families don't have this custom,
which accounts for the puzzlement of a little boy who went to dinner
with his parents at the home of a very elderly gentleman.  After
watching the old man bow his head and speak in hushed tones, the boy
asked his mother, "What did Mr. Bryan say to his plate?"

from "Faith, Hope and Hilarity:  The Child's Eye View
of Religion" by Dick Van Dyke

This is an honest-to-God, true story. About 20 years ago, when 
I was a young girl, and prettier than now, I got all dolled-up for 
New Year's Eve, with a long floor length  gown, as was the 
custom, then. I was especially dressed up, because, as I said, 
it was New Year's Eve. My husband took me to the Casinos in 
Atlantic City, and we were seated at a table, playing Blackjack, 
for about a half hour, and the other players and dealer were 
staring and staring at me, something fierce !!. I thought to 
myself, WOW, I must look BEAUTIFUL, tonight ! (You know how 
we all feel, when we are dressed to the hilt, and have new duds 
on. Ha. Ha. )  SO, I thought, this was the case, and was feeling 
SO GOOD! All of a sudden, I lost a hand, where I had foolishly 
placed a $25.00 bet (Don't forget, that cheap me, had been 
playing only $2.00, a hand, prior to this). I said to myself: "OH 
SHIT, I LOST!!!!!!!", and placed my left hand on my head. 
HOLY COW !! At that very moment, I touched Hair Rollers, on 
my head. I whispered to my husband, "Take my money, and 
meet me at the Ladie's Room, I'm not coming back". I was so 
humiliated, I wanted to die. When I reached the Mirror in the 
bathroom, and looked, I had three pink rollers on the right side 
of my head, and 3 green rollers on the left side of my head. Can 
you believe this person, I'm married to? Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. I can 
laugh now, but it was VERY Embarrasing ! When he met me at 
the Bathroom, and I started to fight, he calmly told me "Well, I 
DIDN'T KNOW !  I  thought, this was a new fashion, so I didn't 
say anything!

Sent by Elena

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