Today's poems [3.31.08]

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There was an old hag named Le Sueur 
            Who just was an out-and-out whore. 
                Between her big tits 
                You could come for two bits, 
            And she'd fuck in any old sewer. 

There was a young man from Venice 
            Who played a good game of lawn tennis. 
                But the game he liked best, 
                Far more than the rest, 
            Was played with two balls and a pennis. 

Oh, pity the Duchess of Kent! 
               Her cunt is so dreadfully bent, 
                    The poor wench doth stammer, 
                    "I need a sledgehammer 
               To pound a man into my vent." 

A young Ph.D. passing by, 
               She gave him the problem to try. 
                    He worked the division 
                    With perfect precision, 
               And the answer was B-A-B-Y. 

There was a young lady from Kent,
When her husband's pecker it bent,
She said with a sigh,
"Oh, why must it die?
Let's fill it with Portland Cement." 

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