Today's poems [3.2.08]

Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.

There once was a man of Sag Harbor 
            Who used to go with a fag barber. 
                He gave some auditions 
                In many positions, 
            And now he plays flute with Jan Garber. 

Mary had a little lamb (The sad European version)

Mary had a little lamb,
its coat was full off fleas,
but even worse the little cunt
had foot and mouth disease.

Mary had a little lamb,
its mouth was full of blisters,
but now its on a bonfire,
with all its brothers and sisters.

Sent by Jack

Fool

I just got finished testing in school.
Now taking a nap I start to drool.
It drips off my chin
As my dreams begin.
My peers laugh; I feel like a fool!

               There once was a man named MacBride 
               Who fell in a privy and died. 
                    He had a young brother, 
                    Who fell in another, 
               And now they're interred (in turd) side by side. 

There was a young fellow named Paul
                            
                    Who confessed, "I have only one ball.
                            But the size of my prick
                            Is God's dirtiest trick,
                            
                    For my girls always ask, 'Is that all?'"
                            

By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   March '08 Poems Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31