Today's poems [3.15.08]

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Q. Flaccus in his third liber: 
               "The Romans have no wood-pulp fiber. 
                    A crapulent quorum 
                    Will squat in the Forum 
               And heave dirty stones in the Tiber." 

In the shade of an old apple tree,
Where between her fat legs, I could see
A little brown spot
With the hair in a knot
And it certainly looked good to me 

An agreeable girl named Miss Doves
Likes to jack off the young men she loves.
     She will use her bare fist
     If the fellows insist
But she really prefers to wear gloves.

Comming home at a quarter of three
I caught my wife cheating on me
I raged, "Who's this fink?"
She cried with a wink
"I don't know, It's a new one on me."

                    A girl on a southern plantation
                            
                    Was the product of insemination.
                            So each fathers' day
                            She would send a bouquet
                            
                    To a syringe in a far away nation.
                            

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