Today's poems [2.7.08]

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There was an old curate of Hestion 
            Who'd erect at the slightest suggestion. 
                But so small was his tool 
                He could scarce screw a spool, 
            And a cunt was quite out of the question. 

A seamstress at Epping-on-Tyne 
               Used to peddle her tail down the line. 
                    She first got a crown, 
                    But her prices went down--- 
               Now she'll fit you for ten pence or nine. 

                    There was a young man from Peru
                            
                    Whose lineage was noble all through.
                            Now this isn't crud
                            For not only his blood
                            
                    But even his semen was blue.
                            

There was an old maid in Van Nuys 
               Who went crazy from making mud pies. 
                    She would fill them with farts 
                    And pickled beef-hearts, 
               And bake them between her fierce thighs. 

There once was a man from Sutter,
Who used to jerk off in the gutter,
Till the tropical sun,
Played hell on his gun,
And turned all his cream into butter.

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