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Today's quotes [12.27.08]

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"I went to a job interview the other day, the guy asked
if I had any questions. I said yes, just one, if you're
in a car traveling at the speed of light and you turn
your headlights on, does anything happen? He said he
couldn't answer that. I told him sorry, but I couldn't
work for him then."

 - Steven Wright


Every time I find out the meaning of life, they change it.


After seeing how Disney is doing financially,
I was wondering if I could get the Southern Baptists
to boycott my company.


The only reason I would take up jogging is so that
I could hear heavy breathing again.


I don't exercise at all. If God meant for us to
touch our toes, he would have put them further up on
our body.


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