Today's poems [12.21.08]
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There once was a geologist named Wassal,
Who one day found a colossal fossil.
He could tell by the bend,
And the knob at the end,
That it was the peter of Paul, the apostile.
There was a young man named Cattell
Who knew psychophysics so well,
That each time he shit
He'd stop, measure it---
It's length, and it's breadth, and it's smell.
There was a young man of St. Paul's
Possessed the most useless of balls.
Till at last, at The Strand,
He managed a stand,
And tossed himself off in the stalls.
Here I sit, I'm at a loss
trying to shit out taco sauce.
When it comes, I hope and pray,
I don't blow my ass away.
I was desperate, I was weary
I prayed for holy guidance from above
I thought she came to lead me through the darkness
But then I felt a probing rubber glove...
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