Today's poems [12.19.08]

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               There once was a girl from Anheuser, 
               Who said no man could suprise her, 
                    But Pabst took a chance, 
                    Found a Schlitz down her pants, 
               And now he is sadder Budweiser. 

There once was a man from Sutter,
Who used to jerk off in the gutter,
Till the tropical sun,
Played hell on his gun,
And turned all his cream into butter.

There once was a pious young priest
Who lived almost wholly on yest
"For", he said, "It's plain,
We must all rise again,
And I want to get started at least"

There once was a well-groomed young nance 
               Who responded to every advance, 
                    But rather than strip 
                    He let anything slip 
               Through a hole in the seat of his pants. 

               There was a young colonel from Trent 
               Who lived in a lavender tent. 
                    He said that some sessions 
                    With interesting Hessians 
               Had taught him what war really meant. 

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