Today's poems [11.9.08]

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               I sat next to the Duchess at tea. 
               It was just as I feared it would be: 
                    Her rumblings abdominal 
                    Were simply phenomenal, 
               And everyone thought it was me. 

A golfer named Sandy MacFarr 
               Went to bed with a Hollywood star 
                    When he first saw her gash he 
                    Cried, "Quick, goot muh mashie! 
               Uh thunk uh c'n muk it in par." 

               A fellow who lives in St. Paul 
               Has one hexadronical ball. 
                    The cube of its weight, 
                    Plus his penis, times eight 
               Is his phone number; give him a call. 

There was a young Georgian named Lynd 
               Who'd never in all his life sinned, 
                    For whenever he'd start 
                    He'd be jarred by a fart, 
               And his semen was gone with the wind. 

                    There once a woman from Clover
                            
                    Who really enjoyed to bend over.
                            When a guy got behind her
                            Jumped all up inside her
                            
                    And fucked 'til the whole day was over.
                            

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