Today's poems [11.29.08]

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A sultan named Abou ben Adhem
Thus cautioned a travelling madam,
"I suffer from crabs
As do most us A-rabs,"
"It's alright," said the madam, "I've had 'em."

A morbid young lady named Jean 
               Was known as the Masochist Queen. 
                    She used thistles and cacti 
                    In pursuit of her practi, 
               In a manner both odd and obscene. 

A company of Grenadier Guards 
               While traversing the park, formed in squads, 
                    Saw two naked statues 
                    At three-quarter pratt views, 
               Which perceptibly stiffened their rods. 

The voice from the UFO cried,
"To the smartest we'll give a free ride!"
Several men volunteered,
But the ship disappeared
With a whale and two dolphins inside. 

                    In the soap opera heard in Gomorrah,
                            
                    The heroine wakes up in horror
                            To find that a prick
                            Nearly three inches thick
                            
                    Is halfway up her tune-in-tomorrow.
                            

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