Today's poems [11.23.08] Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.
There was a sailor from Brighton Who remarked to his girl, "You're a tight one." She replied, "Bless my soul, You're in the wrong hole! There's plenty of room in the right one!"
There once was a man from Nepal Whose turds were exceedingly small. He'd sit in his room And shit on a spoon And then flick his turds down the hall.
There was a young genius in Texas Who could flex his own solar plexus. It made his ding bounce, And he caught every ounce Of his magical spraying of sexus.
As the elevator car left our floor, Big Sue caught her tits in the door; She yelled a good deal, But had they been real, She'd have yelled considerably more.
It was under the old apple tree That she first showed it to me. It was ever so hot, It was shaped like a slot, But it looked like a subway to me. With a twinlke so full in her eye, She craftily mangled my fly. Out popped a tool That was long as a rule And she sank to her knees with a sigh. She proceeded to lube up my tool With lots of her natural drool. My knees gave a shake, My breath hard to make, And my tool throbbed away like a fool. With a magnificent shake of her head, She threw me down onto the bed. The apples so round, The leaves on the ground Made my tool like a sail on the Med. The subway engulfed all my tool. She rocked like she's riding a mule. My tool gave a jerk, Let out a hot squrt, And flooded her subway with jooul. As the sun sank slow in the west, She rose up and off of my chest. The tool flopped out bent It was terribly spent-- She absorbed all the best of the rest!
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