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Today's poems [11.16.08]

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There was an old man from Peru
Who dreamt he was eating his shoe.
He awoke in a fright 
In the middle of the night
And found it was perfectly true.


There was a young girl from nace 
            Whose corset just would not lace. 
                Her mother said, "Nellie, 
                There's more in your belly 
            Than ever went in through your face." 


There once was a gal named Lewinsky
   Who played on a flute like Stravinsky
   'Twas "Hail to the Chief"
   on this flute made of beef
   that stole the front page from Kaczynski.



               A certain professor named Yarrow 
               Had trouble seducing a sparrow. 
                    When he'd given up hopin' 
                    He pried her jaws open, 
               And filled up her bill with his marrow. 


               There once was a man from Rangoon 
               Who was born 9 months too soon. 
                    He didn't have the luck 
                    To be born by a fuck; 
               He was scraped off the sheets with a spoon. 


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