Today's jokes [11.4.08]
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Q: Why did the woman cross the road?
A: More to the point, what was she doing outside of the kitchen?
Three little old ladies, sitting on a park bench.
The town flasher comes by and shows them his ALL!
The first little old lady had a huge stroke. The
second little old lady had a little stroke.
The third little old lady would have had a
stroke................but her arms weren't quite long enough.
How does a Russian commit suicide?
He smells his armpit
How does an American commit suicide?
He tells this joke to a Russian.
God, I was wondering...how long is a million years to you?"
God answered, "Son, a million years to me is like a second to you."
So the man asks, "God how much is a million dollars to you?"
And God answered, "Son a million dollars to me is like one penny to
So the man asks, "God, can I have one of your pennies?"
And God answers, "Just a second son."
In little Johnny's class at school, there's this kid with no arms or
legs called Philip. One day after school, Johnny goes round his house
and knocks on the door.
Philip's mother answers the door, and says, "Yes Johnny, what can I do
"Can Philip come out? - we're all skipping in the park"
Philip's mum says, "But Johnny, you know he's got no arms or legs."
"Yeah, I know," says little Johnny, "I just want to see his stumps
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