Today's jokes [11.3.08] Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.
Virus Alert There is a very dangerous virus going around and it is propogated through the email system. If you get an email message with the subject: "VIRUS ALERT!" do not open the mail message. If you do, the virus scrambles the second half of every text file on your system. VERY IMPORTANT: If you do get this virus, the first thing dlkfjaid dfdjas nairb gfdq40wt yaj asdfsdg dluog av da[agj asdfajpg as dflasidffnm asd difvu asdfa vgoiae vdsofj we dasdf 9efm sd dag0 g adf jdl5gkj dkllj djf hsas9kaj kuieh nx3glkj gkdls kd li8siue ghkld hks1 as dg 0vbwe ads gwefawe ads vewerwe dsf!
Appear to Work Late. Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out. Send important emails at unearthly hours (e.g. 9:35pm, 7:05am, etc...) and during public holidays.
A man was driving up a steep and narrow mountain road. A woman was driving down the same road. As they passed each other, the woman leaned out the window and yelled, "Pig!" The man immediately leaned out his window and replied, "Bitch!" They continue on their way and as the man rounded the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.
As the end of the day drew near, the handsome executive called his newly hired red-headed assistant into his office. "Do you know what time we quit around here ?" he asked. "Sure !" the girl nervously giggled. "Whenever somebody knocks on the door."
A first-grade teacher was overseeing her students as they experimented with their desk computers. One boy sat staring at the screen, unsure how to get the computer going. The teacher walked over and read what was on his screen. In her most reassuring voice, she said, "The computer wants to know what your name is," then she walked over to the next child. The boy leaned toward the screen and whispered, "My name is David."
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