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Today's jokes [11.14.08]

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How do you make love to a fat girl?

Roll her in flour and go for the wet spot. 

1. 




The pretty secretary came in late for work the third day in a row.
The boss called her into his office and said, "Now look Sharon, I
know we had a wild fling for a while, but that's over. I expect
you to conduct yourself like any other employee around here. 
The boss pressed on, " Who told you you could come and go as you
please around here ?" 
Sharon simply smiled, lit up a cigarette, and while exhaling said,
...."My lawyer."

2. 




"ALCOHOL KILLS SLOWLY"
So what ? Who's in a hurry ?

3. 




What's the definition of a real loser?

A guy who has a wet dream and gets HIV.

4. 




What's green and smells like pig?

     - Kermit's fingers. 

5. 



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