Today's poems [1.7.08]

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A young lady from South Carolina 
               Placed fiddle strings 'cross her vagina. 
                    What, with proper sized cocks, 
                    Once was sex, became Bach's 
               Tocatta and Fugue in D Minor. 

               There was a young man from Jodhpur 
               Who found he could easily cure 
                    His dread diabetes 
                    By eating a fetus 
               Served up in a sauce of manure. 

               A pathetic appellant at Reno 
               Was as chaste as the holy Bambino, 
                    For she'd married a slicker 
                    Who stuck to his liquor 
               And scorned her ripe maraschino

Part 1 of 2:
   
                    There was a young girl with a pretty-ass,
                            
                    And her habits were neat but invidious.
                            She would wipe with a taper
                            Of scented blue paper,
                            
                    Since she was so very fastidious.
                            

Once a pirate named Yates 
            Danced the jig for all of his mates. 
                He slipped in his cutlas, 
                And made himself nutless, 
            And now he's quite useless on dates. 

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