Today's poems [1.26.08]

Vote for the poem that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to poem categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your poem reading.

There was a young fellow named Sweeney 
               Whose girl was a terrible meanie. 
                    The hatch of her snatch 
                    Had a catch that would latch--- 
               She could only be screwed by Houdini. 

                    A young baseball fan named Miss Glend
                            
                    Was the home team's best rooter and friend,
                            But for her the big league
                            Never held the intrigue
                            
                    Of a bat with two ball at the end.
                            

There was an old man of Duluth
Whose cock was shot off in his youth.
He fucked with his nose,
And his fingers and toes,
And he came through a hole in his tooth. 

               There was a young girl from Peru 
               Who badly wanted to screw. 
                    She tried a broom-handle 
                    And the end of a candle, 
               But threw them away for a Jew. 

There once was a woman from France,
Who did an unusual dance.
She'd roll in the grass,
And lick her own ass,
Her sex would put men in a trance.

By voting you are helping select today's best poem. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best poems to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   January '08 Poems Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31