Today's poems [1.14.08]

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There was once a sad Maitre d'hotel 
            Who said, "They can all go to hell! 
                What they do to my wife--- 
                Why it ruins my life; 
            And the worst is, they all do it well." 
                                      

                    A studious professor named Nestor
                            
                    Bet a whore all his books he could best her.
                            But she drained out his balls
                            And skipped up the walls,
                            
                    Beseeching poor Nestor to rest her.
                            

               There was a young lady whose cunt 
               Could accomodate a small punt. 
                    Her mother said, "Annie, 
                    It matches your fanny, 
               Which never was that of a runt." 

                    There was a young lad from Nahant
                            
                    Who was made like the Sensitive Plant.
                            When asked, "Do you fuck?"
                            He replied, "No such luck.
                            
                    I would if I could but I can't."
                            

A man loved a gal named Bundy
Who came from the Bay of Fundy.
But to his despair,
She gave him the air
Sic transit gloria mundi. 

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