Today's jokes [7.25.07]

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A woman orders a chicken sandwhich and starts to choke.
People are running frantically, trying to figure out
what to do. Two homosexuals sitting in the corner wisper
to each other and run in front of the choking lady. One
strips out of his overalls, bends over butt naked in front
of his friend. His friend proceeds to lick the other's ass.
Upon seeing this, the lady vomits forcing the lodged food
from her throat. After making sure the lady is OK, the two
homosexuals return to their food.

One turns to the other and says,
"Wow, that hind-lick manuever really works!" 

"give me the bad news first."
"You've got AIDS."
"Oh, no!  What could be worse than that?"
"You've also got Alzheimer's Disease."
"Oh.  Well, that's not so bad.  At least I don't have AIDS."

So the elephant says to the naked man . . .

"You breathe through that little thing?" 

More Jesse news... 

Public Statement by the Rev. Jesse Jackson 

Due to the great consternation caused by the revelation of my act of 
procreation, I accept my obligation to give an explanation to the
population for my act of copulation. I gave in to temptation, for the 
anticipation of sexual gratification, that I could not obtain through 
masturbation, resulted in my fornication. I accepted her invitation,
and provided her with excitation, stimulation, penetration, replication, 
and liberation. She provided lubrication (to avoid inflammation) and I 
wore condoms to avoid contamination. 

She cried for duplication but I insisted upon termination, in spite her 
fascination with variation. This has caused me great aggravation, and 
the agitation and provocation of the media has resulted in my humiliation,
denigration, and degradation. My wife is considering castration, which
would require my hospitalization. 
Pray that this matter will find culmination in my sanctification and 
rehabilitation so that my plans for nomination to my ultimate vocation 
will not result in revocation and termination. I hope this proclamation 
has provided illumination and verification and will prohibit further 
provocation. 

Sincerely, 

The Rev. Jesse Jackson 

How do you confuse a blonde?

Put her in a round room and tell her to pee in the corner.

How do you confuse her even more?

Ask her where she went.

Sent by Chris

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