Today's poems [6.6.07]

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In the shade of an old apple tree,
Where between her fat legs, I could see
A little brown spot
With the hair in a knot
And it certainly looked good to me 

A habit uncouth and unsav'ry, 
               Kept the Bishop of Essex in slav'ry, 
                    Midst shrieks, hoots, and howls, 
                    He'd bugger large owls, 
               Which he kept in an underground av'ry.

There once was a man named Sweenie,
 who spilled some gin on his weenie.
 So just to be couth,
 he spilled some vermouth.
 And then slipped his girl a Martini.

There once was a kid named Darren
Who's room was surprisingly barren
He had no toys
Like all normal boys
But he did believe in sharing

               A depraved old Jew from Estretto 
               Buggered every young man in the ghetto. 
                    He once had his hose in 
                    A musician, composing, 
               Who said: "Not so slow---allegretto!" 

(Yeah, I know it's nasty...)

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