Today's poems [6.26.07]

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I'm sure you can imagine 
As plain as can be 
The place is Piccadilly 
The players He and She.

She whispered "will it hurt me?" 
"Of course not" answered he 
"It's a very simple process, 
You can rely on me." 

She said "I'm very frightened, 
I've not had this before. 
My friend has had it five times 
And said it can be sore". 

Then finally contended 
Lay back and relax a bit 
Quickly and readily he bent over her 
And then he started it. 

It was growing rather painful 
Tears formed in her eyes 
It was hurting quite a bit now 
It must have been quite a size. 

"Calm yourself" he whispered 
His face was filled with a grin 
"Try and open a bit wider 
So I can get it in". 

"It's coming now" he whispered 
"I know" she cried in bliss 
Feeling it deep within her now 
She said "I am glad I am having this". 

And with a final effort 
She gave a frightened shout 
He gripped it in anguish 
And quickly pulled it out. 

She lay back quite contended 
Sighed and gave a smile 
She said "I'm glad I came now 
You made it worth my while". 

Now if you read this carefully 
The dentist you will find 
Is not what you imagined 
It's just your dirty mind! 

A farmer I know named O'Doole
Has a long and incredible tool.
He can use it to plow,
Or to diddle a cow,
Or just as a cue-stick at pool. 

A bather whose clothing was strewd
By breezes which left her quite nude
Saw a man come along
And unless I'm quite wrong
You expected this line to be lewd.

NIGHT OF DARKNESS

AS I LOOKED OUT THE WINDOW OF THE NIGHT
AND STARE INTO THE DARKNESS.
A WAKING NIGHTMARE OF DELIGHT
ETERNAL BLACKNESS UNTIL SUNRISE.
THE SPIRIT OF DARKNESS FLOWING THROUGH YOU BLOOD
FOREVER LASTING HAPPINESS.
A SINGLE DEATH ONCE A NIGHT
TO QUENCH THE THIRST OF THE ILVING DEAD.
NOT EVEN A CORPSE LEFT TO ROT
THEY VANISH FROM THE DARK PARKING LOT.


Sent by PHILIP

While in Athens a tourist named Joan
Told her guide, with a trace of a groan,
"Though a fuck is just fine
when I'm lying supine
It's a pain in the ass when I'm prone!"

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