Today's stories [5.10.07]

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Phone Won't Stop Ringing? -- Here's What You Do. 

Leola Starling of Ribrock, Tenn., had a serious telephone problem. But 
unlike most people she did something about it. 
The brand-new $10 million Ribrock Plaza Motel opened nearby and had 
acquired almost the same telephone number as Leola. 
From the moment the motel opened, Leola was besieged by calls not for her. 
Since she had the same phone number for years, she felt that she had a 
case to persuade the motel management to change its number. 
Naturally, the management refused, claiming that it could not change its 
stationery. 
The phone company was not helpful, either. A number was a number, and just 
because a customer was getting someone else's calls 24 hours a day didn't 
make it responsible. After her pleas fell on deaf ears, Leola decided to 
take matters into her own hands. 

At 9 o'clock the phone rang. Someone from Memphis was calling the motel 
and asked for a room for the following Tuesday. Leola said, "No problem. 
How many nights?" 
A few hours later Dallas checked in. A secretary wanted a suite with two 
bedrooms for a week. Emboldened, Leola said the Presidential Suite on the 
10th floor was available for $600 a night. The secretary said that she 
would take it and asked if the hotel wanted a deposit. "No, that won't be 
necessary," Leola said. "We trust you." 
The next day was a busy one for Leola. In the morning, she booked an 
electric appliance manufacturers' convention for Memorial Day weekend, a 
college prom and a reunion of the 82nd Airborne veterans from World War 
II. 
She turned on her answering machine during lunchtime so that she could 
watch the O.J. Simpson trial, but her biggest challenge came in the 
afternoon when a mother called to book the ballroom for her daughter's 
wedding in June. 
Leola assured the woman that it would be no problem and asked if she would 
be providing the flowers or did she want the hotel to take care of it. The 
mother said that she would prefer the hotel to handle the floral 
arrangements. Then the question of valet parking came up. Once again Leola 
was helpful. "There's no charge for valet parking, but we always recommend 
that the client tips the drivers." 

Within a few months, the Ribrock Plaza Motel was a disaster area. 
People kept showing up for weddings, bar mitzvahs, and Sweet Sixteen 
parties and were all told there were no such events. 
Leola had her final revenge when she read in the local paper that the 
motel might go bankrupt. Her phone rang, and an executive from Marriott 
said, "We're prepared to offer you $200,000 for the motel." 
Leola replied. "We'll take it, but only if you change the telephone 
number."

IDIOTS WITH COMPUTERS

I worked with an individual who plugged her power strip back
into itself and for the life of her, could not understand why
her system would not turn on.

Foreshadow of Y2K?

In March 1992 a man living in Newton, near Boston,
received a bill for his as yet unused credit card
stating that he owed $0.00. He ignored it and threw
it away. In April he received another and threw that
one away, too. The following month the credit card
company sent him a very nasty note stating they were
going to cancel his card if he didn't send them
$0.00 by return of post. He called them, talked to
them, they said it was a computer error and told him
they'd take care of it.

The following month our hero decided that it was about
time that he tried out the troublesome credit card
figuring that if there were purchases on his account it
would put an end to his ridiculous predicament. However,
in the first store that he produced his credit card in
payment for his purchases, he found that his card had
been cancelled.

He called the credit card company who apologized for the
computer error once again and said that they would take
care of it. The next day he got a bill for $0.00 stating
that payment was now overdue. Assuming that having spoken
to the credit card company only the previous day, the
latest bill was yet another mistake. So he ignored it, and
trusted that the company would be as good as their word
and sort the problem out.

The next month he got a bill for $0.00 stating that he had
10 days to pay his account or the company would have to take
steps to recover the debt. Finally giving in he thought he
would play the company at their own game and mailed them a
check for $0.00. The computer duly processed his account and
returned a statement to the effect that he now owed the credit
card company nothing at all.

A week later, the man's bank called him asking him what he was
doing writing a check for $0.00. After a lengthy explanation
the bank replied that the $0.00 check had caused their check
processing software to fail.

The bank could not now process ANY checks from ANY of their
customers that day because the check for $0.00 was causing
the computer to crash. The following month the man received
a letter from the credit card company claiming that his check
had bounced and that he now owed them $0.00 and unless he
sent a check by return of post they would be taking steps to
recover the debt.

The man, who had been considering buying his wife a computer
for her birthday, bought her a typewriter instead.

Sent by Marina

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