Today's quotes [5.13.07]

Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.

"While I was doing this, a neighbor walked up, and I just want to say that if
 you think it's easy to explain why you're squatting in your driveway, in
 front of a set of burning underwear, surrounded by hair spray bottles,
 holding a Barbie doll in your hand, then you are mistaken."
                        -- Dave Barry

What we call human nature, is actually human habit. -- Jewel

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.

In the woods a saw a rabbit with a candle making shadows of people on a 
tree.

                                           - Steven Wright

"Experts say that if we go to war with Iraq, oil could reach as much
as $80 a barrel. Of course, after the war it will be free."

                                                   - Jay Leno

By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Funny Pic   May '07 Quotes Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31