Today's jokes [5.10.07]

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Q: Why couldn't the blond pass her drivers test? 

A: Every time the car stopped she jumped in the backseat. 

Age           EXCUSES FOR REFUSING DATES

        17         Need to wash my hair
        25         Need to wash and condition my hair
        35         Need to color my hair
        48         Need to have Francois color my hair
        66         Need to have Francois color my wig

Two boys are playing football in Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by 
a Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the 
nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the 
dog's neck.
A reporter who is strollin by sees the incident, and rushes over to
interview the boy. "A brave New Yorker saves friend from vicious animal", 
he starts writing in his notebook.
"But I'm not from New York" the boy replies.
"I'm visiting from Kentucky!"
The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes,
"Redneck bastard kills family pet".

Seems that the traveling salesman was driving in the country and his car 
broke down. He hiked several miles to a farm house, and asked the farmer 
if there was a place he could stay over night. 
"Sure," said the farmer, "my wife died several years ago, and my two 
daughters are 21 and 23 but they're off to college, and I'm all by my 
self, so I have lots of room to put you up." 
Hearing this, the salesman turned around and started walking back towards 
the highway, and the farmer called after him...."Didn't you hear what I 
said? I have lots of room." 
"I heard you," said the salesman,"but I think I'm in the wrong joke."

What is It?

                    Bush has a short one. Gorbachev has a long one. 
                    Maddona does not have one. And a priest does not 
                    use his. What is it?

                    A Last name

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