Today's quotes [3.2.07]

Vote for the quote that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to quote categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your quote reading.

"Fuck you kitty, I won't do what you tell me."
                        -- Ruth Hopping

If you think you've seen everything in Paris, visit the Pere Lachasis
Cemetery. It boasts such immortals as Moliere, Jean de la Fontain, and
Chopin.

"Luke I am your father... and your brother."

                                        -- A redneck Vader

Lisa:  Why are you dedicating your life to blasphemy? 
Homer: Don't worry, sweetheart.  If I'm wrong, I'll recant on my deathbed. 
   -- Always have a backup plan, ``Homer the Heretic'' 

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?"
   Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."
   -- Charlie Brown, Peanuts [Charles Schulz]

By voting you are helping select today's best quote. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best quotes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Jokes Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Funny Pic   March '07 Quotes Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31