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Today's poems [3.9.07]

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There was a young man of Dumfries 
            Who said to his girl,"If you please, 
                It would give me great bliss 
                If, while playing with this, 
            You would pay some attention to these!" 

1. 




There is a young nurse in Japan
Who lifts men by their pricks to the pan.
A trick of Jujitsu
And either this shits you
Or makes you feel more like a man. 

2. 




I'd cross the hottest desert,
I'd swim the deepest sea,
I'd climb the highest mountain,
But I can't come over tonight because it's raining.

3. 




Tombstone Epitaph:

Here lies a nun, she lived to the age of one hundred and ten
She gave to the worms what she refused to men



4. 




There was a young fellow named Biddle
Whose girl had to teach him to fiddle.
She grabbed hold of his bow
And said, "If you want to know,
You can try parting my hair in the middle." 

5. 



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