Today's jokes [3.11.07]

Vote for the joke that you really like by checking a box next to it. Then press the VOTE button to submit your votes. Also, links to joke categories and "Send to Friend" will open in a new window, so as not to interrupt your joke reading.

A woman visits her physician. After waiting for a while it's finally her 
turn. She enters the doctors' office and sits down. The PhD asks her: 
"Well, what can I do for you madam?".
The patient blushes and the PhD sees that apparently she is embarrassed so 
he says: "You can discuss any matter with me, everything is strictly 
confidential."
So the patient says: "My husband complains that my pussy smells bad, is 
there a cure for this?"
"Sure", the doctor says, "It can be a fungus, or a little infection, 
nothing unusual, please undress and lay down, so I can examine you and
prescribe a treatment."
The woman undresses, gets up the bed and with her legs spread waits until 
the doctor attends her. He comes in, walks towards here, starts gasping 
for air, covers his mouth and nose with a hand and runs out of the office. 
After a minute or so, he enters again, covering his mouth and nose with 
one hand an a 7 feet wooden stick with an iron hook on it in the other 
hand.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaagh, what will you do to me?" shouts the patient.
"Nothing", says the doctor, "I'm just going to open the roof window a 
little."

What is the last thing to go through the mind
of a mosquito when it hits your windscreen?

It's ass.

Friend: Vern, are you going to take your wife Alice on your next cruise?
Vern: Yes, indeed. I just can't leave her behind alone. 

Q: Why can't Jesus eat M & M's?
A: Because they fall through the holes in his hands.

What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer

By voting you are helping select today's best joke. This helps us provide you with better quality humor in the future, as well as to select the best jokes to send in our daily best humor mailing.

But wait! Don't forget to read Today's Stories Today's Poems Today's Quotes Today's Funny Pic   March '07 Jokes Issues: S M T W Th F St 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31