Today's quotes [2.17.07]

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"Minds are like parachutes, they only function when they're open."
                        -- Bumper sticker

Here's a good joke to do during an earthquake: straddle a big
       crack in the ground, and if it opens wider, go "Whoa! Whoa!" and
       flail your arms around, like you're going to fall in.

For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but
   phone calls taper off.
   -- Johnny Carson

"The length of a film should be directly
related to the endurance of the human bladder." 

Alfred Hitchcock. 

"If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and
all the impersonators would be dead."

                             - Johnny Carson

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