Today's poems [2.9.07]

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               A team playing baseball in Dallas 
               Called the umpire a shit out of malice. 
                    While this worthy had fits 
                    The team made eight hits 
               And a girl in the bleachers named Alice. 

There was a young girl of Cohoes
               Who jerked herself off with her nose. 
                    She said, "Yes, I done it, 
                    But just for the fun it 
               Afforded the folk of Cohoes." 

                    In the Garden of Eden they dwelt;
                            
                    And on his right knee, Adam knelt.
                            He said to his Eve,
                            "Do you really love me?"
                            
                    And that's when she answered, "Who else?"
                            

               A girl attending Bryn Mawr 
               Committed a dreadful faux pas. 
                    She loosened a stay 
                    In her decollete, 
               Exposing her je-ne-sais-quoi 

A bad little girl in Madrid, 
               A most reprehensible kid, 
                    Told her Auntie Louise 
                    That her cunt smelled like cheese, 
               And the worst of it was that it did! 

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