Today's poems [2.6.07]

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There was once a mechanic named Bench 
               Whose best tool was a sturdy gut-wrench. 
                    With this vibrant device 
                    He could reach, in a trice, 
               The innermost parts of a wench. 

There was a young lady from Wheeling
Who professed to no sexual feeling
Till a cynic named Boris
Just touched her clitoris
And she had to be scraped off the ceiling

Said a meaty young woman of Croft,
  Amusing herself in the loft, 
     "A salami or wurst 
Is what I should choose first--- 
With bologna you know you've been boffed." 

There was a young fellow of Strensall, 
                                        Whose prick was as sharp as a pencil. 
                                                      On the night of his wedding, 
                                                      It went through the bedding, 
                                        And shattered the chamber utensil. 

               There was a young fellow named Bream 
               Who never had dreamt a wet dream, 
                    For when lacking a whore 
                    He'd just bore out the core 
               Of an apple an fuck it through cream. 

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