Today's poems [2.21.07]

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An opera singer named Black 
            Would fuck anything with a crack: 
                Sidewalks and board fences, 
                Young goats and cheese blintzes, 
            And the cheekiest man in his claque. 

               A bobby of Nottingham Junction 
               Whose organ had long ceased to function 
                    Deceived his good wife 
                    For the rest of her life 
               With the aid of a constable's truncheon. 

There was a young girl, very sweet,
Who thought sailors' meat quite a treat.
When she sat on their lap,
She unbuttoned their flap
And always had plenty to eat.

A horrid old lady of Summit, 
               Every time she got laid had to vomit, 
                    And although she would groan 
                    When her man got a bone, 
               "Give it here," she would say, "and I'll gum it!" 

A king sadly said to his queen, 
            "In parts you have grown far from lean." 
                "I don't give a damn, 
                You've always liked ham," 
            She replied, and he gasped, "How obscene!" 

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