Today's stories [11.3.07]

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The label on a box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:

GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE.

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls.  I was
unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several
minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen  who works
at the store.  He asked if he could help me.  Without thinking I looked at
him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."

A sign in Aamchi Mumbai restaurant:

OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO

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