I know a mother-in-law who sleeps in her spectacles, the better to see her 
son-in-law suffer in here dreams. 
       - Attributed to Ernest Coquelin 

If you think the way to a man's heart is through
his stomach, you're aiming too high. 

"Hey diddle diddle the cat and the fiddle but the cow has failed on it's first
 attempt at the moon landing!!... that's one small step for a cow, one giant
 leap for the beef industry..."
                        -- Flacco, DAAS Kapital

"'Son I am able' she said 'though you scare me', 'Watch' said I, 'Beloved' I
 said 'Watch me scare you', 'Though' said she 'able am I son'..."
                        -- They Might Be Giants, "I Palindrome I"

The most terrible of all intellectual weapons ever wielded by
man was the mockery of Voltaire.
        --Tallyrand