Maggie is such a sad sack of shit 
               That no one will tickle her tit. 
                    It would make her so glad 
                    To be had by a lad, 
               Her drawers cream at the mere thought of it. 

There was a young lady of Clewer
Who was riding a bike when it threw her.
A man saw her there
With her legs in the air
And seized the occasion to screw her. 

There once was a monkey named Spunky,
Who was always referred to as chunky.
So he went on a diet,
He shouldn't have tried it.
He became anorexic and died.


Sent by Mike F.

               A Chinese chef named Chang 
               Made dishes of unusual tang. 
                    He stirred his wok 
                    With the head of his cock 
               'Til oyster sauce poured from his wang. 

   I came here
   To shit and stink,
   But all I do
   Is sit and think.