Today's jokes [1.23.07]

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What kind of Bees make honey?
                                  Honey Bees!
What kind of Bees make Milk?
                                  BOOBIES!

Names to Use in Prank Calls



                                         Hugh G. Rection
                                           Jim Nassium
                                         Claire Voyence
                                          Buster Hyman
                                    Anita Moore (Roger's Mom)
                                           Dick Peede
                                            Mike Hunt

                                        Mai Dixie Wrecked
                                      Jon Doe's brother Dil

   Mr Smith goes downstairs in the morning and his doorman says, "Mr
   Smith, how are you?" Smith says, "I feel great." Doorman says, "But
   you look terrible!" Smith says, "But I feel great."
   
   When Smith gets to the office, his secretary asks him how he is. He
   says, "I feel great!" She says, "But you look terrible." He says, "But
   I feel great." Smith goes to lunch with his friend and they have just
   the same conversation. His friend insists that he goes to the doctor
   and so that is what Mr Smith does.
   
   The doctor asks what the problem is. Smith says, "I feel great but I
   look terrible." Dr says, "I don't know that ailment so I'll look in my
   medical book." The doctor takes out a huge tome. "Feels great, looks
   terrible..." he says as he turns the pages, "Feels great, looks
   terrible.... Feels gre... I've got it!! You're a vagina!"
   

How did the Burger King get the Dairy Queen pregnant? 

     He forgot to wrap his whopper. 

   Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning
   service, and she's in tears.
   
   He says, "So what's bothering you, dear?"
   
   She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away
   last night."
   
   The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, Mary, did he
   have any last requests?"
   
   She says, "That he did, Father..."
   
   The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?"
   
   She says, "He said, 'Please, Mary, put down the Goddamn gun...'"
   

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