In a classified ad: 

    "For rent: Six room hated apartment." 

A massive cold front swept across the nation this week,
but it's not expected to affect the election.
Says Hamilton, "The Weather Channel said the five-day
forecast for Bob Dole is three days." 

IDIOTS IN MANAGEMENT

At a good-bye lunch for an old and dear coworker who
is leaving the company due to "downsizing" our manager spoke up
and said, "This is fun. We should have lunch like this more
often."  Not another word was spoken. We just looked at each
other like deer staring into the headlights of an approaching truck.