As an art teacher for an elementary school here in Jacksonville, Florida, 
one of my recent assignments for the children was to enter a contest that 
our new national football team, the Jacksonville Jaguars, was promoting.

The winning artwork gets placed on the back of the season tickets, so I 
encouraged the children to come up with a good logo and a colorful 
creation.

One innocent little girl was so enthused about her masterpiece she turned 
in to me. It had a picture of a mean looking jaguar that read, "You're 
messin' with the wrong pussy."

Sign in a Leipzig elevator: 

    Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up. 

A freshman at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the Greater Idaho 
Falls Science Fair, April 26. He was attempting to show how conditioned we 
have become to the alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of 
everything in our environment. In his project he urged people to sign a 
petition demanding strict control or total elimination of the 
chemical "dihydrogen monoxide." 

And for plenty of good reasons, since it can: 

1. cause excessive sweating and vomiting 
2. it is a major component in acid rain 
3. it can cause severe burns in its gaseous state 
4. accidental inhalation can kill you 
5. it contributes to erosion 
6. it decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes 
7. it has been found in tumors of terminal cancer patients 

He asked 50 people if they supported a ban of the chemical dihydrogen 
monoxide. Forty-three said yes, six were undecided, and only one knew
that the chemical was...water. 

The title of his prize winning project was, "How Gullible Are We?" The 
conclusion is obvious.