A little boy was in a relative's wedding. As he was coming
down the aisle he would take two steps, stop and turn to the
crowd (alternating between bride's side and groom's side).
While facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws
and roar. So it went, step, step, "ROAR," step, step, "ROAR,"
all the way down the aisle. As you can imagine, the crowd was
near tears from laughing so hard by the time he reached the
pulpit.
The little boy, however, was getting more and more distressed
from all the laughing, and was also near tears by the time he
reached the pulpit. When asked what he was doing, the child
sniffed and said, "I was being the Ring Bear."

New White House Pet

President Bill Clinton has purchased yet another pet for the White House 
to keep his cat and dog company.  The 18 yr. old horse was delivered to 
the White House yesterday. Mr. Clinton took the afternoon off to ride the 
new arrival which he has  named "Missie".
Mr. Clinton did not allow the press to attend his  first encounter with 
Missie. He said "She needs some time to settle  into her new home, but
she's a beautiful beast and quite a challenge to ride.  Hillary is still
not convinced this is a good idea but she knows how important riding 
horses is to me."

This is an honest-to-God, true story. About 20 years ago, when 
I was a young girl, and prettier than now, I got all dolled-up for 
New Year's Eve, with a long floor length  gown, as was the 
custom, then. I was especially dressed up, because, as I said, 
it was New Year's Eve. My husband took me to the Casinos in 
Atlantic City, and we were seated at a table, playing Blackjack, 
for about a half hour, and the other players and dealer were 
staring and staring at me, something fierce !!. I thought to 
myself, WOW, I must look BEAUTIFUL, tonight ! (You know how 
we all feel, when we are dressed to the hilt, and have new duds 
on. Ha. Ha. )  SO, I thought, this was the case, and was feeling 
SO GOOD! All of a sudden, I lost a hand, where I had foolishly 
placed a $25.00 bet (Don't forget, that cheap me, had been 
playing only $2.00, a hand, prior to this). I said to myself: "OH 
SHIT, I LOST!!!!!!!", and placed my left hand on my head. 
HOLY COW !! At that very moment, I touched Hair Rollers, on 
my head. I whispered to my husband, "Take my money, and 
meet me at the Ladie's Room, I'm not coming back". I was so 
humiliated, I wanted to die. When I reached the Mirror in the 
bathroom, and looked, I had three pink rollers on the right side 
of my head, and 3 green rollers on the left side of my head. Can 
you believe this person, I'm married to? Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. I can 
laugh now, but it was VERY Embarrasing ! When he met me at 
the Bathroom, and I started to fight, he calmly told me "Well, I 
DIDN'T KNOW !  I  thought, this was a new fashion, so I didn't 
say anything!

Sent by Elena