As Apollo was chasing the fair 
               Daphne she vanished in air. 
                    He could find but a shrub 
                    With thick bark on the hub 
               And not even a knot-hole to spare. 

               There was a young laundress of Lamas 
               Who invented high amorous dramas 
                    For the spots she espied 
                    Dried and hardened inside 
               The pants of the parson's pajamas. 

Said an old lady called Mary Tabott,
"I wish I had teeth in my twat.
For just think" said she,
"how nice it would be
To keep all the pricks that I got." 

The Best!!

A weary old lecher named Blott
Took a luscious young blonde on his yacht.
    Too lazy to rape her,
     He made darts out of paper,
Which he leisurely tossed at her twat.

There was an old lady who lay 
            With her legs wide apart in the hay, 
                Then calling the ploughman, 
                She said, "Do it now, man! 
            Don't wait till your hair has turned gray."