Work Environment: 
(Wise manager) + (Wise employee) = PROFIT 
(Wise manager) + (Dumb employee) = PRODUCTION
(Dumb manager) + (Wise employee) = PROMOTION 
(Dumb manager) + (Dumb employee) = OVERTIME

A Polish family is sitting in the living room.

The wife turns to the husband and says, "Let's send the kids 
out back to p-l-a-y , so we can fuck."

One day a priest went into a public bathroom to use the stall. While he 
was on the toilet, he heard moaning coming from the stall next to him. He 
stood up to look over, and there was little Jimmy, sitting on the toilet 
masturbating.
The priest was shocked. He told Jimmy that he knew what he was doing in 
there and that he should save it for marriage.
Little Jimmy agreed to this only because it was coming from a priest. 
About a week later the priest ran into Jimmy at the mall and asked him how 
he was doing with his problem.
Jimmy replied "Great father, I've saved a whole quart!" 

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a 
picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one 
raises his/her hand. The teacher says "See it's long neck? What 
animal has a long neck?"

Sally holds up her hand and asks if it is a giraffe. "Very good 
Sally," the teacher replies. Next she holds up a picture of a zebra. 
None of the students holds up his/her hands. "See the stripes on 
this animal? What animal has stripes?" Billy holds up his hand and 
says it is a zebra. "Very good Billy," the teacher replies. Next 
she holds up a picture of a deer. None of the students recognized 
the animal.

"See the big antlers on this animal. What animal has horns like this?"

Still no one guesses. "Let me give you another hint, it's 
something your mother calls your father."

Johnny shouts out "I know what it is, it's a horny bastard."

    Three people were standing on the Titanic, An American, a
   Brit and an belgian. It was almost sinking. The captain told everyone
   to go into the liveboats. The Brit yelled "Women and children first".
   The American said "Screw the women and children" and the Belgian
   answered "Huh, do we have enough time left to do that?"