Noted Dough Boy Dies

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died Wednesday
of a severe yeast infection He was 71. He was buried Friday
in one of the biggest funerals in years. Dozens of
celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the
California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, and the
Hostess Twinkies The graveside was piled high with flours,
as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy,
describing Fresh as a man who "never knew he was kneaded".

Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was
filled with turnovers. He was not considered a smart cookie,
and wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Still,
even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model to millions.
Fresh is survived by his second wife. They had two children,
and... one in the oven. 

Still, there are some things a big company can do that
a small band of programmers could never hope to accomplish.
This was best shown to me this week by reader
Brian P. McLean, who points out that according to his
Microsoft Outlook 97 scheduling/datebook application,
Thanksgiving falls this year on Wednesday, November 26.

Thanksgiving has always fallen on Thursday before. Wednesday
may be an improvement. I don't know. 

    - Robert X. Cringely, from his "I, Cringely" column (November 7, 1997) 

IDIOTS ON THE ROAD

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it is safe
to cross the street.  I was crossing with an intellectually
challenged coworker of mine(a blonde), when she asked if I knew
what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
She responded, appalled "What on earth are blind people doing
driving?"