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                    There was a young girl with a pretty-ass,
                            
                    And her habits were neat but invidious.
                            She would wipe with a taper
                            Of scented blue paper,
                            
                    Since she was so very fastidious.
                            

There was a young barmaid from Yale, 
               On whose bust was written the prices of ale; 
                    And on her behind 
                    For the sake of the blind 
               Was exactly the same, but in braille. 

There was an old fellow named Rapp 
            Who had a job all considered a snap. 
                In the insane asylum 
                He'd grade cunts and file 'em, 
            And bi-weekly he'd rub up their nap

There was a young fellow named Perkin
Who always was jerkin his gerkin.
His wife said, "Now Perkin,
Stop jerking your gerkin,
You're shirking your firking, you bastard." 

There was a young girl named Sapphire
Who succumbed to her lover's desire.
She said, "It's a sin,
but now that it's in,
Could you shove it a few inches higher?"