"WARNING: preposterous time in TOY clock -- CHECK AND RESET THE DATE!!"

-- Digital UNIX 4.0D

Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy.
One is to let her think she is having her own way, and
the other is to let her have it. 

     - Lyndon B. Johnson 

Despair leads to boredom, electronic games,
computer hacking, poetry, and other bad habits. 

     - Edward Abbey 

The Clairvoyant Society has cancelled today's meeting due
to unforeseen circumstances. 

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues
that are in all the other museums.