There once was a lass from Seattle
                            
                    Who had a habit of sucking off cattle,
                            'Till a bull from the south
                            Shot a load in her mouth
                            
                    And made her ovaries rattle!

There's a lot has been said 'bout the breast--- 
               Like how nicely they feel when they're pressed. 
                    But when push comes to shove, 
                    In this business of love, 
               Its "twats" 'tween the legs that is best. 

               There once was a girl from Anheuser, 
               Who said no man could suprise her, 
                    But Pabst took a chance, 
                    Found a Schlitz down her pants, 
               And now he is sadder Budweiser. 

A sempstress at Epping-on-Tyne 
            Used to peddle her tail down the line. 
                She first got a crown, 
                But her prices went down--- 
            Now she'll fit you for ten pence or nine. 

                    The ancient orthographer, Chisholm.
                            
                    Caused a lexicographical schism
                            When he asked to know whether
                            "Twere known which was better
                            
                    To use "g" or "j" to spell "jism."