A widow who lived in Rangoon 
               Hung a black-ribboned wreath on her womb, 
                    "To remind me," she said, 
                    "Of my husband who's dead, 
               And of what put him into his tomb." 

There was a young girl of La Plata 
            Who was widely renowned as a farter. 
                Her deafening reports 
                At the Argentine sports 
            Made her much in demand as a starter. 

Three things are certain

Death, taxes, and lost data.

Guess which has occurred.

               There once were two brothers named Luntz 
               Who buggered each other at once. 
                    When asked to account 
                    For this intricate mount, 
               They said, "Assholes are tighter than cunts." 

There was a young girl of Peru 
               Who had nothing whatever to do, 
                    So she sat on the stairs 
                    And counted cunt hairs--- 
               Four thousand, three hundred, and two.