There was a young girl of high station 
               Who ruined her fine reputation 
                    When she said she'd the pox 
                    From sucking on cocks--- 
               She should really have called it "fellation."

A pathetic old maid of Bordeaux
Fell in love with a dashing young beau.
To entice his regard
She would squat in his yard
And appealingly piss in the snow. 

There once was a lady, Ilene,
Who liver on distilled kerosene,
But she started absorbin'
A new hydrocarbon
and since then she'd never benzene

There was a young man of Dumfries 
            Who said to his girl,"If you please, 
                It would give me great bliss 
                If, while playing with this, 
            You would pay some attention to these!" 

A musical lady from China
Stretched catgut across her vagina
The result of this trick
(With a well-rosined prick)
Was _Toccata and Fugue in D minor_