"no, tom waits. (he does, I've seen him)"
"what is he waiting on?"
"the floor"
"Oh.  Its a slow floor.  He'll be waiting a while."
"yeah... but Godot should be here soon"
                        -- myself and Sabrina, on #polyamory

"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better
verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of
that study: Duh."

                                     - Conan O'Brien

I believe every human has a finite number of heartbeats.
I don't intend to waste any of mine running around exercising.

    - Neil Armstrong 

I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous
       and give the wrong answers.

I told my girlfriend last night how much I loved her,
and she said that I must have been out drinking again.
I asked her why she would say that, and she said,
"Because I'm your father." 

    - Dave George