I couldn't find the remote control to the remote control.

Life is like a shit sandwich. The more bread you have, the less
       shit you have to eat.

"You have to run as fast as you can just to stay where you are.
If you want to get anywhere, you'll have to run much faster."

     - Lewis Carroll 

"Psst... hey Guido... it's all so clear to me now... I'm the Keeper of the
 Cheese... and you're the Lemon Merchant... and he KNOWS... that's why he's
 going to KILL us... and we have to get away before he sets loose the
 marmosets upon us... DON'T WORRY LITTLE MISSY!! I'LL SAVE YOU!!"
                        -- Ren, from Ren & Stimpy, "In The Army"

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?"
   Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."
   -- Charlie Brown, Peanuts [Charles Schulz]