Bill Gates wanted to look good and impress everyone with his success. He 
decided to measure the accomplishments of Microsoft against General 
Motors. The comparison went like this: If automotive technology
had kept pace with computer technology over the past few decades, you 
would now be driving a V-32 instead of a V-8, and it would have a top 
speed of 10,000 miles per hour. Or you could have an economy car that 
weighs 30 pounds and gets a thousand miles to a gallon of gas. In either 
case the sticker price of a new car would be less than $50. In response to 
all this goading, GM responds: "Yes, but would you really want to drive a 
car that crashes twice a day?

   True story from a Novell NetWare SysOp:
   
   Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
   Tech Rep: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
   Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty
   period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
   Tech Rep: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
   Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
   Tech Rep: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am.
   Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a trade show? How
   did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
   Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a
   promotional. It just has '4X' on it." At this point the Tech Rep had
   to mute the caller, because he couldn't stand it. The caller had been
   using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it
   off the drive.

In a study of college students, Cornell University researchers 
confirmed that men generally prefer thin women to fat ones. It's 
part of Cornell's new "M.Obv - Masters of the Obvious" degree 
program.